“Surprise – we’re married”

Posted on 20 Sep 2017


Do you know what I love the most about elopements? It’s because they say so much, often with so little. But while many would admit to having had at least considered 'running away to get married' - why would a couple actually go ahead and choose to elope?

In my experience, couples elope for LOTS of reasons, and each situation really is unique. Some couples just want a simpler, stress-free day with as little planning as possible and that is budget-friendly. Or perhaps it’s for the romance of it all, or it may be that same-sex weddings are not legal in their country. Perhaps they wish to seal their relationship, but without the planning, expense and fuss?  Others may indeed want a bit of fuss with a few beautiful details planned and included for them, but still only involving a limited number of people.

For all of these reasons, and many many more, for some eloping is a GREAT option. Elopements have become a simpler yet much more beautifully presented wedding ceremony than in days gone by. An elopement creates an incredibly private, intimate moment between two people in love, made no less special because there aren’t a hundred eyes watching on.  In that moment it is more about starting a life together and less about worrying if the people in the back can hear you.

In my recent experience, and also talking with colleagues in the wedding industry, it has become apparent that elopement weddings are becoming much more common.  New Zealand has become a very popular tourist destination in recent years and with huge exposure given to the Taranaki region from publications such as Lonely Planet , many overseas couples dream of having their weddings and honeymoons here and are making that a reality! Also, our marriage license laws make it easy for couples from overseas to come to New Zealand to marry and with the ongoing issue of Marriage Equality still unresolved in Australia, I'm sure we will continue to see increasing numbers of couples choosing to come here to make it official.

Whatever the reason, when all is said and done, if you have gone ahead and eloped then its also best to prepare for some hurt feelings. Circumstances will vary but to diffuse the situation, I do think it’s best to tell everyone as soon as possible after the fact. Some people won’t get why you have made that decision, while others will be disappointed to learn they will not get the chance to be involved in your wedding day. My advice is to explain to family and friends exactly why you have/had decided to elope and if they love you and want you to be happy, then they will totally understand those reasons. 

That, and no one should ever have to base their wedding on what suits others. 

Do it your way.

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